31 December 2012

Friend Makin' Mondays:2013

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section over at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!
1. Share one thing that you plan to do for yourself in 2013.  I plan to start eating clean.
2. Share a good habit that you will continue doing into the new year. I'm going to continue to follow my morals and eat vegetarian.
3. Do you make new year's make resolutions? If so, do you typically stick to them? I usually make them and work on them throughout the year, but I never end up actually keeping them.  This year I am setting goals for myself instead of resolutions.. Lots of shorter term goals. 
4. Do you have any health goals for the new year? I need to stop eating sugar.  Seriously.  It's like some crazy snowball effect where I eat one thing sugary and the next thing you know, I am rolling in a giant vat of donuts or something. Disgusting.
5. Share one thing that you plan to do in January. I'm throwing Deven's first big deal, big boy birthday party.
6. Do you have any travel plans for the coming year? If so, where are you most excited to go? I'd like to go to NYC with my family, to Boston again with my family, of course to Maryland.  We probably should go to Alabama or South Carolina, too.  Some of the fun stuff might have to slide.
7. What are your plans for New Year's Eve? My dad and his partner are up for the new year.  We will have a laid back event where we eat healthy, drink too much, and enjoy my family.  Plus my dad's partner and I are going to Kohl's. She has Kohl's Cash.  PLUS we are going to go to David Bacco so I am going to end the year with some extra delicious chocolate.
8. What are your resolutions for 2013? Swear less is my resolution.  Everything else on my list are goals.
9. What are you looking forward to most over the next 12 months?I plan to spend a good amount of time knitting, hanging out with my besties, who are thankfully doing my Q1 fitness challenge with me. 
10. Share something unique that you hope to do in 2013. I don't have anything particularly unique, but I hope to need to cycle through thinning out our possessions further, being a better housekeeper and getting fit.

Now it's your turn to answer this week's questions!  Don't forget to come back and link up in the comments, and say hi to someone new!  Happy New Year!!!!!!!

Goals Not Resolutions.

I'm starting a clean eating and fitness challenge that will culminate with a 47 flight stair climb to benefit Lung Cancer.  I'd prefer that that not kill me, so I am going to need to do some substantial training and remove some weight.  Since that stair climb is at the end of March, I am going to shoot for removing 10% of my body weight in Q1.  That would make a substantial difference in both my body and my health.

In  addition to that, I have some specific fitness goals.

My first goal is to lose about 30% of my body weight.  I need to lose more than that, probably, but 30% would put me in a really wonderful place. (Fit and healthy, not fat)  BUT, I don't expect that I *HAVE* to lose all of that this year.  I want to lose it by 6/6/2014- the day I turn forty.  So I need to get my rear in gear, so to speak.

My next goal is to keep my promises to myself.  If my promise is that I will get up before work 3x before work to do 20 min of Zumba, that's not that hard, not that unreasonable and that's going to start my day a good way. (Ohhhh, sounds like I am going to be making that promise to myself.)  But as part of my goal to be nicer to myself, I will be making sure that I keep my promises to me.

Be nicer to myself.  It's time to stop flogging myself for my transgressions. If you made some mistakes, would I walk up to you and say "Hey, you moron, why are you such a failure? OH MY GOD, YOU SUCK!"
No?  They why would I do that to myself? I'm constantly guilty of this.

Eat clean.  I want to MAKE my food, not buy it ready for microwaving.  I keep telling my dad that everything has two costs, one to your wallet and one to your health.  (In this case, the first cost is to my time).  I'm not so busy that I can't take the time to make some real food for my family instead of buying a bunch of processed, packaged nonsense.

That's it.  That's all that's on my agenda.  I think it's enough for Q1 of 2013.

Happy New Year!

19 December 2012

A New Challenge

On Friday, I got an email from a friend.  It's a 'Not Your Usual' Challenge. 

It runs from 1/6/2013 - 3/30/2013

It's setting goals, not resolutions.  Included in the challenge fee is

Initial Body Composition Analysis at program kick off
Before pictures at a professional photographer
Weekly Group Training Class (limited to 8 people per class)
Weekly Fitness Challenges
Weekly Foodie Focus including eating clean, super foods, recipes, healing through nutrition
A weekly group coffee chat and counseling sessions
Final Body Composition Analysis at the end of the challenge
After pictures from a professional photographer
and a team challenge to either run a 5k or do a 47 flight stair climb.

I've been thinking about it a lot.  I think I am going to train for the stair climb.  I might do the 5K, but I already know that I can move my body 5k.  I may not be able to run the whole thing, but I can definitely get myself down the road for at least 6 miles with little difficulty.  The stair climb is a real challenge.  I also think it's a pure test of fitness.

I think this is just the kick in the pants I have been needing.   The best part is that my two best friends are doing it, too, so I have pure support from them.

I'm very excited.  I will be coming here once per week to talk about these challenges.

Oh and by the by?  I've received two Klutchclubs and it's not for me.  I am going to be cancelling.  The items contained there are just not for me.

17 December 2012

Twelve in 2012 FMM

How do you feel about 2012?  Let's discuss it, shall we?
Now...If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section over at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

Twelve in 2012

1. What was your greatest personal accomplishment in 2012?  I stuck to being a vegetarian, even when I wanted to make a different decision.
2. What's the best thing your did for your health?  I kept trying.  That's always my goal.  I have a tendency to just say "eff it", throw my hands up and walk away.
3. Share one thing that caused a significant change in your life this year.  I started training to transition to a new position at my company.
4. List a few things that you experienced for the first time at some point over the last twelve months.  
- I did my first full quote at work.
- I went to my first Passion Party
- I went to my son's first Graduation (from Preschool to 4k)
5. What was the coolest place you visited? I went to Boston.  Boston is absolutely my kind of town.
6. If you could change one thing about the last year what would it be?  I would have worked harder to keep my focus.  As it is, I am going to end the year heavier than when I began.  Depressing.
7. What is the best meal you ate this year? There is this restaurant here that makes vegetarian meat loaf.  YUM.
8. Tell us about a new friend you made.  I started talking more to a coworker.  Additionally, I have strengthened a lot of friendships this year.
9. What did you hope to accomplish this year that you did not? I had hoped to lose at least 20 lbs this year. I am heavier than last year.  Heartbreaking.
10. Share something you learned in 2012.  I am working on treating myself with respect. 
11. Share an odd and unexpected thing that you experienced this year.  I don't think we had any unexpected things.
12. How do you think 2013 will differ from 2012?  I will be in a new position at work, I will also be kicking off the new year in a fitness challenge with several friends.  I hope this gets me on the right track.

Now it's your turn!  Don't forget to go to All the Weigh and link up in the comments! 

12 December 2012

Struggle, always struggle

I'm not sure where to start on this.  It's another come to Jesus post.  I have one every few weeks. I've been trying to lose weight for as long as I remember, but I am not trying hard enough.  I continually look for excuses not to be on plan.  It's very unhelpful.  I've been working on loving myself more, but that's also hard when you keep gaining and losing the same 15 pounds over and over.  I'm very frustrated.  Moreso at how easy it is for me to just fall off the plan and resume eating not just unhealthfully but horribly.

I keep thinking that I need to switch programs because this or that isn't working for me, but let's be real.  What isn't working for me is ME.  Any of these calorie reduction programs will work if I log my food and stay within my range.  I don't need to change programs. I just need to stay on one.  ANY one.

I keep telling people (because it is true) The common thread in all of your problems is YOU. 

Now, don't get me wrong.  I think I'm awesome.  I'm a loving person.  I am terse, certainly, but I am caring.  I'm a good mom, if too distracted by this and that.  I'm a good employee for the most part.  But I stink at self discipline. I'm a reasonable and reasonably healthy cook. I'm turning into one hell of a knitter.  But I am the mayor of creating problems for myself.

I've put my poor husband in a tough spot, because I keep asking him for help, but then I get pissy when he helps.  This man, this poor, long suffering man, loves his wife no matter how she looks.  He just wants her to love herself.  But instead, I keep veering off my diet whenever it is inconvenient, then flogging myself for not losing or worse gaining.

So today, I am counting my calories.  I am avoiding the treat trap in the kitchen.  I will do Walk Away The Pounds tonight.  I will go up and down the stairs 4 times at each commercial break while watching TV.  It doesn't have to be big stuff, but it does have to be something.

I can do this.  I can end this year lighter than I am right now.  I can move closer to my goals next year.  I could even REACH my goals given enough discipline, but for now, I will settle for just doing better than I am today.

I know I can.  I know you can, too. 

08 December 2012

I'm back

I'm doing less than the normal holiday struggling, but I am struggling plenty. 

Mostly, I just keep letting life get in the way.  Back from vacation for a week, I had my work holiday party.  And lunches out.

But now I am home, counting calories again, happy to be home.

I'm really just endeavoring to make it through the holidays not gaining weight. After that, I will get serious again and try to go on South Beach. I'm not sure how South Beach works for vegetarians, though.  I have NO desire not to be a vegetarian...

03 December 2012

A good weekend, but not an on plan one

Saturday, I did really well staying around my calorie range.  Sunday, I didn't even track.

I did go swimming for 2.5 hours yesterday.  More importantly, I went to see my high school friend,  Chad Elliott perform.  I'm sorry to say that there wasn't much of a crowd, but I think he made some new fans.  He put on a great show, as always.

If he comes to your area, you should go see him.  You don't have to like Folk Music.  It's stirring to see someone so passionate about what they do.

I am back on plan today :)  Have a great week, everyone!

29 November 2012

Day 2, plus TMI Overload

So yesterday, I did great. I exercised, I ate within my calorie range, I drank my water. EXCELENTE.

I wasn't hungry at all.  I planned for a small treat- a granola bar.  This is where the TMI comes in.
So anyway.  I can't eat Fiber One Bars.  I love them, but they don't love me back.  I swear off of them every few months, but always come on back to them because I love them so much.  Yesterday, the granola bar I had was one of them.

OMG the pain.  Within an hour of eating it, the stomach pains start.  I know I need to go to the bathroom because HI, I AM AT WORK.  Yeah. So I sounded NOT AWESOME. NOT AWESOME AT ALL.  I noticed on the way into the stall that my stomach, not small in size on a good day, is massive.  I looked about 6 months pregnant.  After I was finished, uhm, trumpeting, I left the stall, went to wash my hands and WHOA.  I totally looked like I lost 20 lbs.

So, apparently Fiber One Bars make me a little gassy.

So, I think I will just go ahead and pass on Fiber One Bars until the next time.  Or until I need to take revenge upon Raj or Farting Coworker.

28 November 2012

Day 1

So I am just going to count down the days of eating properly.

Yesterday, I was within my calorie range and drank a good amount of water and I lost 4 water weight pounds from my vacation.

I have a great plan for today and hope to be down a few more pounds.  The weather is getting too dark to do much proper exercise outside, which I prefer, so I need to do a DVD tonight.  Plus some good stretching. 

If I can do that, I will be very satisfied with my progress this week.

My son is also recovering from being on vacation.  He's a whiney entitled mess.  That's what happens when you take him somewhere that he can do no wrong for 6 days.   Two time outs yesterday and he is feeling a little more compliant today.  Hopefully that carries through work, because I want to watch Charlie Brown Christmas with him tonight.

So how are you?  What are your staying on track during the holiday strategies?

27 November 2012

Back On

We are back after being gone for nearly a week.  Before that, it was nearly a week of off plan eating.  As a result, I have gained back ALL that I had lost PLUS some pounds.  Very frustrating.  Now I am sitting here needing to lose at least 85-90 lbs and ready to start all over in the HARDEST weight loss time of year. 

My office is a pitfall of treats.  My strategy is this.  I will eat things that are very special to me and count them.  If there are treats I am not crazy about, I will not eat them.  I will log my snaccidents on myfitnesspal.com

I've made my lunch- it contains 5 servings of fruits and veg, two vegetarian proteins and a grain. 

Our vacation was to Maryland and we are all, very bluntly, over fed.  My in-laws are pure food is love people.  No matter what you just ate, you will be asked to eat more.  Always.  It's very difficult to refuse. I came home about 10 lbs heavier than when I left.  There's a good chance that a lot of that weight is water weight, so I should see some results relatively quickly.  I am going to record my daily weigh.  I do this anyway, so maybe I will be more day to day accountable.  This is a slippery slope for me, though, because I can get a bit scale obsessed.

The first few days will be difficult.  For 6 days, I have been stuffed full to bursting over and over.  Eating normal amounts of food will leave me famished.  For these two days, I have to be tough, vigilant.


21 November 2012


I'm just wanting to send a note out to everyone.  Of course, absence means I've been off of my plan.  It hasn't been great.  I've had fun but I've done damage to healthy living.

I am getting ready to head into Thanksgiving, but once it's all over, I will be back and blogging.  Swear it.

I'm Thankful this year for my family, my friends, the blogs that I read and those that read mine.  For my job, for my company's enlightened approach to management.

My life is good.

11 November 2012


So this weekend, I am not on plan.  I'm not making good choices, but I am staying active.

I will be right back on it tomorrow.  I just needed a twee little break.

I got up this morning and baked some biscuits for Sunday breakfast.  Pre Deven being born, we had a baked good every Sunday.  I love that tradition and I have decided to bring it back.  I also made brownies with Dev and we sat around all morning, relaxing and enjoying.

At noon, I put on my coat and shoes and took the pup for a 4 mile walk.  We enjoyed ourselves a great deal, but it was raining heavily and I got soaked to the bone.  I'm proud of this walk because we have a very rare tired puppy!  HOORAY!

I love to see a tired little dog.   He's sitting on the floor all worn out and sleepy.

06 November 2012

KLUTCHclub review, continued

I tried these two items in the last couple of days.

DeVita Natural Eyeliner

I haven't tried this yet, either.  I will at some point.

UPDATE.  Meh.  It doesn't transfer to my skin very well. Color is nice.  I use so little eyeliner that I am a tough person to review.

Hungershield Natural Appetite control drink.
I haven't tried this yet either.  I wish there was more than one tube.  It's hard to determine if one sample fixed my hunger or if I am just confusing hunger with thirst.  I do that sometimes.

DeVita Natural Eyeliner

I haven't tried this yet, either.  I will at some point.

Hungershield Natural Appetite control drink.
I haven't tried this yet either.  I wish there was more than one tube.  It's hard to determine if one sample fixed my hunger or if I am just confusing hunger with thirst.  I do that sometimes.

UPDATE:  This product DID make me lose my appetite, but only because it was so gross.    YUCK. -1, would not taste again.

05 November 2012

Friend Makin' Monday - Ten Reasons to Be Thankful

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section over at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links there too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

Ten Reasons To Be Thankful
1. I'm thankful for my family! They make me laugh and make me want to be a better person every day. I'm never lonely because I always have them. 
2. The courageous service of our military, past and present.  Here is a picture of my Grandpa when he was in the Army during WWII.  He was a sharpshooter that served on the front line in 5 major battles in WWII.  He was on the front lines at the Battle of the Bulge.  He died with a bullet from the war lodged in his elbow.

3. I am thankful for my dog, who makes outdoor exercise both necessary and fun.  He's quickly become an awesome friend.  I am thankful to my cats for their unconditional love.  I am especialy grateful for my cat, Tommy.  He is a nine year old cat with a kitten face.  He is ridiculous and makes me laugh.
4. For having a good job. For feeling secure at work.
5. For having enough money to house and feed my family, For having enough for some of the finer things in life.
6. That I get as many chances as I need to reach my goals.  There is no limit to the number of restarts I can have.  I can always try again.
7. That I am getting ready to transition into my new position at work.  My current position is great but its very stressful.
8. That I have vacation coming up at the end of the month.  I'm just exhausted.  I am absolutely ready for some time off.
9.  For knitting.  Knitting always refocuses my heart and keeps my hands busy.  I can almost always change any frustration into something productive.  Right now, I am knitting baby hats for the less fortunate.  (I need to get busy with my winter knitting.  I don't have a hat and Dev needs mittens and a scarf)
10.  My friends.  All of them, but especially the two gorgeous ladies I see the most often.  Coffee and gossip with them refreshes my heart.  I know I can always count on good advice, a sympathetic ear and, if appropriate, tons of outrage on my behalf. 

Now it's your turn to answer this week's question!  Don't forget to come back and link up in the comments!  Happy Monday!

04 November 2012

KLUTCHclub review

I got my first KLUTCHclub box.  It was a pretty nice box overall.  I haven't tried absolutely everything in it, and of course, I totally forgot to take pictures of anything.  I am lame like that.

This month's box included

Coromega Omega3+D Squeeze supplement.
- Meh.  It tastes fine, but is gross to vegetarian me because it contains fish oil.  Because I worry about things, I was worrying if taking that supplement makes me a pescatarian instead of a vegetarian.  I decided it doesn't because I remain totally disgusted by the idea of eating fish.  I tried floating it on top of my Metamucil but that was the ickiest thing I have ever experienced.  So yeah.  I wouldn't buy this, but I would buy one that didn't have fish oil.

Yurbuds- Earbuds guaranteed not to fall out

These are ok.  The shape of them is mildly uncomfortable for me, but I do like them.  Also, I totally needed new earbuds, so good timing, KLUTCHclub.

Good Greens (gluten free natural raw bar) - I had 3 50 calorie bars to try.  They all taste pretty good, but I am not crazy about the coconut flavor, but otherwise, this was pretty good.

Pure Matters Chocolatey Vegan Protein- 

I am definitely some kind of bad healthy focus person, because I don't really believe in protein powder and I have never found one I liked.  So I've been dragging my feet on trying this one.  I will eventually give it a try, just not today.  I'm sure it is lovely.

King Arthur Flax

I haven't tried this, either.  I need to look into what I would use this with.  I will review this later on.  Pinky Swear.

DeVita Natural Eyeliner

I haven't tried this yet, either.  I will at some point.

Hungershield Natural Appetite control drink.
I haven't tried this yet either.  I wish there was more than one tube.  It's hard to determine if one sample fixed my hunger or if I am just confusing hunger with thirst.  I do that sometimes.

To Go Brands Acai Natural Energy Boost Chews

I was given two of these to try. Two too many. Yuck.  Chalky and undelicous.

YumUniverse Plant Based Gluten-Free Holiday Guide www.yumuniverse.com

This has a couple of recipes and there's $100 off a $300 membership.  This looks fine. I will probably look toward the recipes for how to use my Flax.

Overall, even though I am feeling kind of negative about some of the items in the box, I found getting the box to be REALLY fun.  I like trying new things and I like hearing about nichey things that I wouldn't have access to normally. Verdict: $18/month well spent.

Plan Revisions

I've been struggling with my plan for about a year, on and off.  I think maybe my expectations aren't realistic for me right now.  So I edited things to plan for one hour of activity four times per week with 1650 calories to consume per day.  If I do that consistently, I should be able to lose about a pound a week.  Maybe that's not some fast, sexy result, but it's healthy.  And if I lost 52 lbs in the next year, I would be pretty happy with where I am. 

So yeah. That's what I am trying now.  Because I totally etch-a-sketch  my diet but I am allowed to.  It's my own timeline.  No one is hurt by struggle but me.  No one gains from my success but me.

Also, this week, my plan is to sharply limit added sugar for the week.  I am looking at you, leftover Halloween Candy.

02 November 2012

I've been taking it easy

Not really eating well.  Not particularly tracking. Staying active.

Today, I am going to do it right again.  I'm starting by not having Halloween candy for breakfast.


29 October 2012

A bit of a hangover, actually

I didn't manage myself well this weekend at all.  I drank FAR too much, ATE far too much and the wrong things, but we had so much fun.

When I got up Saturday morning, I cleaned the kitchen and made pumpkin bread for breakfast.  I also baked some cupcakes. I took the dog on a 4 mile walk.  We got showered up and

We went to Treinen Farms.  We did a corn maze

Deven really enjoyed climbing on this tire maze
The boys did some pumpkin chucking
Deven lassoed this...cow?

Deven played in a huge vat of corn
Climbed a mountain of tires
and of course picked our pumpkins.  Once we were done picking our pumpkins, we took a horse-drawn hayride

It was chilly, but we had a really wonderful time.  I love doing these kinds of things with my family.

Once we got home from the farm, we went to a friend's house to visit and play with their new baby.  We stayed for a while and went out for Mexican food and came home and drank entirely too much Pumpkin Beer.

On Sunday, we did some shopping, some laundry, some other housekeeping.  I took the dog for a five mile walk.

Then we carved our pumpkins.

All in all, a really great weekend. How was your weekend?

26 October 2012

Parent's Night

Last night we went to Deven's daycare to see what the kids have been doing all year so far.  This is kind of  redundant to me because I am always asking what Deven has been up to and specifically about anything I don't agree with or that he mentions that he is outraged about.

We didn't really talk to the teachers, instead we talked to other parents, in particular,  Deven's friend Violet's mom.  We've become pretty good friends in our own right, so it's great when our kids pick someplace to go on a playdate.

They were also having a bookfair, so we bought two books for Deven.


When we got home, we read some of the Clifford stories and the Splat book.

I was quite over in calories.  I had a miscalculation at Taco Bell (Cantina Bowl ONLY not Chips and Guac, please!)  ALSO, cookies.   Because of Parent's Night, I couldn't exercise yesterday (no time) so overall, I was quite over.

Back on track, today.

25 October 2012


Oh God. This week has been eternal.  It's Thursday finally, so we are wrapping it up.  The problems with blog.com  have created a gigantic pain in the ass, but at least I have something to focus on.

  I've been moving and backdating posts manually.  Some things, like FMM might ultimately be deleted.  It's all kind of a pain.  There are over 300 posts to move from my other blog and none of the import/export tools work.  I ultimately want to take down that blog, so I want it all saved over here.  Plus maybe using this one will remind me to do the monthly updates on my son.  I haven't done any since he was about 3 and he's about 5 now, but he's awesome and notable and deserving of his own posts.

Today is Parent's Night at Dev's daycare.  So we will come home, I will take the dog for a walk (he needs it, that dog is caaarazy) and we will hit Subway, eat fresh, then go find out that our kid is good but whiny, smart but needs to work on his social skills.  You know, stuff we already know but don't know how to fix.

Since I had lunch out with Raj yesterday, I was able to keep my whole lunch at work, so I have some great choices there.  It's all healthy and delicious.

I hope you all have a great day!

24 October 2012

Nature Walk

Over at the other blog, which may or may not (leaning towards not) get moved over here, I've talked about running with my munchkin.  He's not a particularly complaint child. He is enthusiastic to do things with you, right up until you try to convince him to do something that isn't on his specific agenda.  He'll do it but oh man, there will be bitching.  If you are walking, it will be with every step. 

I don't really let that dissuade me because my kid is going to be fit and happy and healthy, damn it.  So after the last run, I didn't want to FORCE the kid to run.  But he's going to do something active with me several times per week.  I decided that what he is going to do is go on a nature walk.

Tonight, I convinced Raj to walk along with us and we brought our little buddy, Conner.

Conner LOOOOVES being out on a walk, especially in new or infrequently visited places. 

So he was extra happy to have the leash on.  Plus, like all dogs, he LOVES to go on a car ride and this particular trail is about 5 miles from my house.  Because I had everyone with, I didn't get much of a workout, but we were out moving for at least 45 minutes and that isn't all bad.  Here is my gang toward the beginning of the walk. I really love everything about this trail.  Especially in the fall.  There are tons of leaves all over the trail, it smells great and every step delivers a lovely crunch that sounds like fall to me.

In part to encourage Deven to come along happily, we brought this soccer ball.  At the beginning of the walk, he kicked it and chased it, and with the exception of the dog, the whole family got involved.  I got to run maybe a total of a quarter of a mile chasing after that silly soccer ball.  More than anything, it was kind of a burden.  I generally prefer having my hands free for being out and about in the world but what are you going to do?  I had Deven carry this ball MOST of the time, when we weren't kicking it around.  In the beginning, the whole family was pretty enthusiastic about this.  Raj was less so, because, well, if you've met Raj, you know he isn't overly enthusiastic about much.

We went along for about 3/4 of a mile and headed back to the car to go home.  I'm glad I had this time with my family.  It was really fun for me and I really hope it was for them, too.

I also tried something new today.  Raj wanted to go out with me for lunch, so I put my entire lunch in the fridge.  I didn't eat any of my snacks at all.  Even with sharing a piece of pie with the family for dessert, I ended up well under my calorie range- I aim for 1250-1500 per day,   I ended today with 1415 calories.  I'm slowly trying to teach myself that hunger isn't an emergency.   I eat pretty hearty breakfasts anyway, and you know, I wasn't even that hungry.  I would say that means that my snacking is more of a habit than it is a necessity and I can start stepping them down, little by little.  If I get used to eating heartier meals and no snacks, maybe that's better.  Because it never seems to matter HOW MANY snacks I have.  I am always hungrier with snacks. So maybe that isn't working out for me.  Worth a try.  Next week, there will be no snacking.


I'm going to give http://www.klutchclub.com/ a try.  It's like Birchbox but with healthy living items.  It's a little more expensive, but I love that I can try new healthy items every month for just $16.

I will probably be reviewing my boxes here.  We will see.  As you know, I'm flaky about this kind of thing.

It's taking a lot of getting used to, this new blog home.  I am going to miss the blog.com format, because I've been blogging there very consistently since January 2011.  But this is good.  Change is good, right?

In other news , my shoes today are fierce.   I think I need to focus on feeling like I look awesome more often.  

I've been doing really well on my plan. Eating roughly what I should be and exercising.  I am going to try to make myself do some Pilates.  I think that will help with my low back pain.

Also, I really need to strength train.

OOOOH, last night's run. IT WAS SUPALAME.  It was about 68 degrees  and I was way overdressed. (same outfit I wore for a run in the 45 degree rain) It was crazy humid and I thought I would die.  BLAH.

23 October 2012


My blog at blog.com has frustrated me for the last time.  I'm rolling over to this older blog and will be making some changes slowly over time.  I will go through my old posts and move over the ones that I think deserve more views.

Otherwise some history is going to be lost because I'm doing this informally.

I hope my limited few readers follow me over here.  I am sure they will.

Be well, everyone. Be well.

22 October 2012

Friend Makin' Monday- Winning the Lottery

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section over at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

Winning the Lottery

What’s the first thing you would do for yourself if you won 100 million dollars?  Note: this question is specifically for you…what would you do for fun after the family and the bills and the obvious stuff was taken care of?

I'd build a new house just the way I want on the edge of town- country in the city :)  It would have a 4 car garage for my Hybrids.  I'd pick up a Prius V, keep my Camry Hybrid, get a Ford Escape Hybrid and leave the other bay for the new family bikes we'd buy.  The house would have a real master suite with a super luxury bathroom.  We'd have a large fenced yard for the dog.

I'd have a workout 'wing' of the house with an indoor track that has some elevation changes. 

I'd take Deven to Disneyworld.  I'd hire a personal trainer and I would DEFINITELY hire a housekeeper.

But it's not going to happen. I rarely buy a ticket because I hate the lottery.  I think it's a voluntary tax on the poor.

Now it's your turn to answer this week's question!  Don't forget to head over to www.alltheweigh.com and leave your answers in the comments!  Happy Monday, friends...

21 October 2012

Emotional Eating 101

I was doing GREAT yesterday.  I went for a 3 mile run/walk.  I was happy. I made a great, healthy breakfast and had a fun plan for the day.  I got the house all cleaned up. It looked great!

We got showered up and headed for Eugster's Farm Market- Fall Festival.  While we were there, we saw some animals.

Raj and Deven were excited to get to the petting zoo portion.
Deven milked a fake cow.
We bottlefed a goat.
Dev rode a trike
Raj and Deven played with a kitten.  This boy was so sweet I wanted to bring him home with us.
Had some apple cider donuts and fresh cold pressed apple cider
and went on a wagon ride to the pumpkin patch

That's where it all fell apart. Deven mentioned again that my shape is ROUND. Like a ball.  My heart broke a little. A lot, actually.  I didn't make good choices the rest of the day.  I started poorly this morning, but I made myself stop and examine my behavior and am turning it around.  Just because he said I am round like a ball, doesn't mean I have to make sure it's true.

16 October 2012

Running with my kid

So, every other day, I am taking Deven out for a very short run.  With each run, he gets a little whinier and more distracted.  I don't think this is because he can't run or even doesn't like to run,   I think it's because he'd much rather play video games. I do know that as we get further into each run, he becomes more focused on the world outside and less focused on what he'd rather be doing, so it seems like bringing him along even if he complains is a good plan for now.

I don't want to force him to do this, but I want to encourage him, certainly.

For me, sitting around playing video games, messing around on the tablet and watching TV are not appropriate past times for your average almost five year old.  I want to encourage him to do things when they feel hard, do things even though he doesn't feel like doing them, and want to do things with me.  I am frustrated that the culture of lethargy starts so early.

I am fiercely protective of my son.  I don't want him to have the same struggles I do.  I don't want his self worth to be defined by the number on the scale, by the size of his jeans.    I don't want him to have to fight his way to fitness.  I want to instill a love of exercise in my son that lasts a lifetime.  I don't know how to go about changing his mindset without him feeling like he is being punished.  And I most especially don't want him to become a lazy and entitled child.

He's certainly someone that wants to take the path of least resistance right now.  I want to instill fight in him.,  Fight will keep him on top even when things are hard. 

I want to keep running with him. I want it to be fun.  I want it to be our thing.

Does anyone have any ideas?

14 October 2012

A Perfect Day, Really.

I got up this morning and anxiously checked the forecast.  It was supposed to be raining really hard all day and I was doing Color Me Rad this morning.  I was determined to run rain or shine, but there was threat of lightening.  We'd get pulled off the course if it was lightening, plus, well, you know, risk of death.

It was cold.  It was about 45 and it was absolutely pissing down.  MISERABLE.  No biggie, I'm running. That's my plan.  it's time to leave the house, it was chilly with a light drizzle.  No bigs.  I can do that.  We get to the course and it's not raining at all. THANK GOODNESS.  Then it starts just downpouring.  I've got Raj and Deven with me.  It's freezing, raining hard and my teammate hasn't arrived with my number.  They won't let me run with it.   A friend text that she was at the course but was heading out, too cold for her.  Finally Heather arrived with my number and we went to the corral to wait for the next wave.

They start tossing color packs and we get lightly colored.  It's still raining quite a bit, but less.  It's crazy cold.  The line starts moving and we get going. Slowly.  I strongly dislike the steerage portion of races.  I sat with my team for a while, but I was cold and I wanted to get the show on the road, so I broke away into a run and made my way to the first color station.  I did a combination of running and walking because I didn't do a good job of monitoring my breathing.  Additionally, it wasn't a timed race and to keep running, you really had to pass people and I am not about that, especially when you have to veer off the course to do it.

It was cold and miserable, but it was a lot of fun.

Here's me at the end of the race.

When I finished, I was so cold, all I wanted was to get my wet clothes off.  Normally, I am very shy about my body, but in this case, I stripped my shirt off in the parking lot and threw a different shirt on over my soaking wet sports bra.  I took my shoes and socks off, pulled my pants off, put on different pants and we headed to buy some hot coffee and hot chocolate and did some shopping.  We then headed over to get some dinner at my favorite pizza place

Then we went to the Fitchburg Fire Department Open House.

Deven loved seeing the ambulance.

and the fire truck

We came home and showered.  My skin was very alarmingly tie dyed and it took a lot of scrubbing.  I still have plenty of dye in a lot of places :)

We went out, did some more shopping and came home and made some dinner (potato soup!)

Dev threw some tantrums so we sent him to his room/to bed and we watched 'My Idiot Brother"  A charming movie, actually. I LOOOOVE Paul Rudd.

What did you all do with your Saturday?

11 October 2012

25 Minutes and Then Some

So last night it was my night to do C25k.  It's week 7, so warm up- run 25 minutes, cool down.  I don't want to say it was easy, necessarily, but I kept my head in the game and I did it without much difficulty.  I need to start pushing myself on the hill front more.  I've never met a race yet that didn't have at least one very substantial hill.  I don't want to be defeated by some little hill, you know? 

When I got home, I did something I've been thinking about doing for months.  Deven keeps mentioning that he wants to run with me. But 4 is too little, right?  Well, I decided that when I finished my 'big' run, I would take him out on a 'little' run.  So I queued up the week 1 podcast and off we went.  We talked and talked while we did our warm up walk.  We discussed fall, Halloween decorations and the neighborhood.  Soon enough, it was time for our first 60 second run.  Mind you, I just got back from about a 2.5 mile run, so I was kind of beat, actually. 

He did great.  I kept reminding him that we had a lot of running ahead of us, so don't go too fast.  He REALLY wanted to turn on the afterburners, but he listened to me and settled into a nice pace.  Soon enough, it was time to walk again.  He started complaining that he was tired.  I told him that you get the best results if you keep working when things get hard.  I could see that rolling around in his little four year old mind and he seemed to like that, because he just kept plugging.  If he'd said "Mom, I am really tired" we'd have headed home, but I want to squash the thing inside him that wants to quit when things get hard.  I want him to be someone who pushes through things and does what he needs to do, whether in school, in fitness, in life.   My tiredness evaporated as we ran, and I could have gone on like that for hours.  We did 8 total one minute runs and we really had a fun time. I'd go so far to say it is the most fun run I've ever had.

We got home, my husband gave Deven a bath while I finished up dinner. An easy meal night- packaged Indian food over brown basmati rice.  As a special treat, I made some pudding for Deven and thawed some frozen blueberries and cherries  and had half a serving of vanilla pudding for dessert.  He was in such a great mood.  I don't know if it was the special time with mom, the endorphins from running or both, but it was really great.

When I tucked Deven in bed last night, I asked him, as I often do, what his favorite part of they day was.  He said it was running with me, seeing the Halloween Decorations through the neighborhood and seeing a gargoyle on the trail we ran on.  I told him that running with him was my favorite part of the day, too. 

He gave me a big hug and settled in for a good night's sleep.

All in all, I feel like I am on track for where I need to be, weight loss wise.  I'm trying to change my mindset where I need to lose 2 lbs every single week. I don't. I just need to live healthfully, burn more than I eat and keep notching it down., little by little.

I feel like I am in a pretty healthy place.

How are you all?

*this post was moved over from my old blog.  All comments are lost.

09 October 2012

My Life Lately

I've been trying to take some time to enjoy life.  I've been working on that eternal struggle- not celebrating with food, not medicating with food.

This past weekend with my family, the emotions were raw.  We all feel protective of my little sister.  She's the kindest of us, but she's also the most brittle in a way.  Her self esteem has been whittled down to nothing and it wasn't too strong to begin with.  Despite that  fact that she's one of the kindest hearts you'd ever wish to know, that she has a capacity for love that few people can match, that she's nearly pure good.  Maybe because of it. I don't know.  But what I know is that her pain is my pain.  I'd take it all from her if I could.   If I could impart any knowledge to her, it would be how strong she is.  She's been holding a marriage together singlehandedly for several years, raising three kids virtually by herself, working and going to school.  She's been trying to sell one house and remodel another.  She's amazing.  She's kind.  Her smile will make anyone smile.  Swear it.

That being said, I veered wildly from my usual more conservative style of eating. (Like I always do when I am in Iowa)  We ate comfort food, pure and simple.  Mac and Cheese, Pizza, Monkey Bread. Donuts.  Normally, I come home from Iowa about 6 pounds heavier, but this time, one day out, I'm up only about 1 lb.  I'm sure if I buckle down, I will be back into losing territory soon.  I need to be.

I went out on a 25 minute run last night. OH MAN was that ever a slog.  I did fine, I really did, but it was exhausting.  The dog was an idiot without interruption and I forgot to breathe correctly and that is so key.  My runs just don't work for me without good, measured breathing.  I got myself through it by sheer will, but it was sooooo hard.

Inconveniently, I have a 5K (Color Me Rad!)  scheduled for this coming weekend.  I'm not ready for it, but I will run as much as I can.  I honestly think I can run the full thing.  I can just slow down and drive it home.  We shall see. I will do my best.

After the run, we plan to go to a farm, feed some goats, enjoy some Apple Cider Donuts and Cider- some good clean farm fun. 

On Sunday, we have a 5K for Autism scheduled. This one is a walk.  I'm looking forward to this, too.  One of our good friends has two children with Autism so this is a favorite cause. 

Looking forward to Sunday weigh in.  I'm anticipating a good one.

*this blog moved from my old blog. 

08 October 2012

My Weekly Weigh In

I weighed in on Friday morning because we were going away for the weekend.  I weighed in down 1.6 and am delighted by this result.  Then I went off to Iowa.  Unfortunately, my eating was way way off all weekend.  I will be on damage control the rest of the week. 

We got to my sister's place at around 10 PM.  We sat down with a cocktail and had a nice visit.  We made plans for the next day and at 4:30 I got up and took my beautiful sister for a run.  She's not a typical runner, so we did short intervals but she kicked ass.  I hope she liked it because it's such a healing thing for me.  No matter how stressed I am, the nature of the way I run helps me every time.  I methodically count my breaths in and out.  With each breath, my stress erodes. She could really use the stress relief.

My beautiful, sweet, loving sister is going through the hardest time in her life. She's struggling to bring herself and her three children through a divorce.  It's new and the wound is fresh.  Unfortunately, the wound is through scar tissue.  I've written before about my parents divorce and how it left its scar on each of us.  Unfortunately, their divorce happened right when my sister was starting to form certain ideas- right as she was going into kindergarten.   My parents divorced amicably, but their marriage before they split up was absolutely god awful.   They didn't just fight. They brawled.  There was screaming.  There was excessive drinking.  People didn't keep their hands to themselves.  A fight would erupt and Amanda and I, without arrangement, would go into Jennifer's room and huddle together with her.  We'd cry, clinging to each other, because we knew when it came down to it, we were all we had in the world. 

One particularly brutal night Amanda- age 4 or 5- about the same age my son is now, went down to try to stop the fighting.  Unfortunately, it turned into a verbal tug of war- "come here sweetheart and show me who you love more."  It was awful. It's both burned into my memory and kind of fuzzy and blocked out.  There are plenty of examples of times like these.  You can see why my parents terrible divorce left wounds that haven't healed in all three of us.  Those wounds are particularly deep in Amanda.  My heart hurts for her that her situation is as it is. 

She's trying to protect three children from the ugly reality of the dissolution of her marriage, leaving as few scars as possible.  She's hurt, she's angry, she's sad, and above all else, she's frightened.   She's faced with changing virtually everything in her life in just a matter of days.  She's doing really well, but doesn't know what she should be doing.  I told her she doesn't need a map for how she should be proceeding right now.  She just needs to keep moving.

I know she's receiving an exhaustive amount of advice right now. A lot of it from an angry place by sisters frustrated by her husband's behavior. I know she's overwhelmed.  I know her family isn't always upbeat and positive about her situation, in particular about her estranged husband.  But she's doing really well.  She's making a lot of really good strides.  I'm proud of her.

I love you, Miss Amanda B.  You're one of the best friends I could ever hope to have.  I'm so proud of you.  Keep your chin up, honey.  You are amazing.

04 October 2012

8 Years

Yesterday, It had been 8 years since we had this [caption id="attachment_404" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="My dad giving me away."][/caption]

8 years since this.

8 years since
and we've been like this ever since.

Happy Anniversary Raj.  I love you.

01 October 2012

FMM Uniquely You

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section over at  at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please add your links both here at at www.alltheweigh.com so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!
 Uniquely You


1) Do you prefer to talk or text? I much prefer a conversation with most people. I have a general four text rule.  If what you have to say can't be resolved with four texts back and forth, just call me.

2) How often do you make your bed? Almost never.  Mainly when company is coming over.

3) What sounds do you hear right now? My son is watching Curious George.

4) List three things that you always carry with you. My Droid Razr, my purse, my AMEX card.

5) What are your favorite TV shows? The Voice, Go On and my local Morning Show on NBC 15.  OH, and Parenthood.

6) Is there a hobby that you’d like to devote more time to? If so, what is it? Knitting.  I have so many projects stacked up and others on the mental knit queue.

7) What is your favorite drink? Coffee, Apple Cider and Water.

8) Share a couple of cool facts about your family. Hmmm, we aren't very interesting.  My Grandpa grew up with a mom that didn't speak English, but she understood it.  As a result, My Grandpa understood Danish, but didn't speak it.

9) List one thing that you will do for yourself today. I've got a run scheduled for tonight.

10) Share something that you’re thankful for today.  I'm thankful for my son and my husband.

Now it's your turn to answer this week's questions!  Don't forget to come back and link up in the comments.  And try to say something to someone new this week. There are some pretty cool people connected here.  Happy Monday, friends!

30 September 2012

Weigh in and Weight Watchers in General

So today at weigh in, I was down 1.6  lbs.  I told my leader that I was leaving Weight Watchers because my pounds lost per dollar ratio is too low, that something in the mechanics of Weight Watchers right now is demotivating to me. 

She and I sat down and are working on a way I might be able to stay in a losing mode with Weight Watchers. I know that it's a program that works for a lot of people, but for me, I have an intensely difficult time staying ON program. This hasn't always been the case.  In 2003, I lost weight very quickly and very easily with Weight Watchers.  I was never not on program.  I excelled at making the program fit my life and making my life fit the program. I'd get to the end of my point range and just stop. It was like an invisible line.

I ended most weeks with more than 30 points in the bank because of activity.  I lost more than 60 lbs from February to October, when I made lifetime.

Now, I've lost 3 lbs in almost a year. 

I need to do something.  My son, lately, has been making remarks about my size.  He mentioned today that I am 'very round'  My feelings are hurt by this.  I mean he's only four and I am trying to teach him that it isn't nice to comment on people's sizes, but he hasn't figured it out yet.  I'd really wanted to have this weight problem resolved before he got to the Fat Mom noticing stage and I am just unbearably sad.  I feel like a failure.  I know that Aimee is going to have something to say about that :).  I just need to get the hurt and sad and channel it into a positive change for me.

My resolve is strong.

Peck's Farm Market

After the Farmer's Market, we went to a farm market.  I took a few pictures in the beginning and then forgot my phone was in my purse.

I'm so awesome. 

Pecks has a petting zoo.  We got to pet Llamas.  I love llamas.

We fed some goats.  LOTS of goats.
Raj + Goats

Goats have no manners

Deven put some corn in the cup and used the wheel to send it over to the goats.

This goat couldn't get on top of this rock fast enough to get the corn we were offering.
impatient goat

I wished I'd taken pictures of the other Pecks. They have several deer and I was able to hand feed them and some lambs.  Everyone was so sweet and soft.  Can't I just move to the country and take care of wildlife all of the time?