01 June 2014

June

Today is June 1.  Let's look back on May and see what I accomplished.  Some of this is real accomplishment and some is brain dump because of really lax blogging.

  •  I made serious progress changing my relationship with food.  At the end of May, I stopped counting points (which is a SERIOUS step away from disordered eating in my view) and started logging calories.  There is something about that Free For All mentality that really leads to bad things in my head.  I've done some seriously disordered things as a Weight Watchers member that I wouldn't do just in life.  As a Weight Watchers member, I didn't change my relationship with food AT ALL.  I just changed the garbage I binged on.  Going to a meeting lead by another binge eater is NOT what I need to be doing.
  •  I stepped completely away from Weight Watchers.  The leader I connected to the most isn't a leader anymore (but is still a friend.)  The leader I could kind of relate to left my meeting and went to another state.  That left us with a leader I cannot relate to.  I find that particular leader triggering because SHE still has so much work to do to change her relationship with food.  She mentions AT LEAST once per month that she tried emotional eating again and it didn't help her.  I am sure seeing her standing there, 160 lbs lighter is inspirational to some, but to me, hearing her talking about continuing with emotional eating is really triggering.  Sorry, disordered eater here.   I've mentioned here that there's a disconnect for me between Weight Watchers promoting a 'healthy' lifestyle and their endorsement of artificial sweeteners, tons of chemicals, fat free dairy, INCLUDING CHEESE, etc.
  • Mile a Day May.  Well, I haven't run a mile in 2 weeks.  Last week, I got a TERRIBLE cold.  Like I missed work for 2 days. I never do that. Then my cough held on for another week. Then I got another cold.  I've continued to walk every day, and probably actually moved my body at least 100 miles in determined exercise in May.    I will keep running 3 times per week, and walking all of the other days but for now, I'm delighted with my activity level except...
  • STRENGTH.  OH MAN, I am bollocks at strength lately.  I'm really wanting to focus on my butt and my legs.  And do some arm work.  I'll do some body weight exercises every day in June.  PROMISE ;)
  • Yoga- I started stretching for 5 minutes after my runs.  But it's not enough.    I'm going to do some more in June, because it's good both for my strength and my flexibility. 
  • I'm changing my focus to learn to love myself as I am.  I'm not moving with ANY weight loss intention right now.  I'm just trying to live a healthy life and not gain weight.  I think this will be a good exercise for me.

So, what's up for June?  Some stuff I'm excited about.  Some stuff I am kind of meh about.

Excited! for:
  • Some friends and Raj's sister are visiting in a couple of weeks.  Can't wait to see everyone again!
  • My friends bought me tickets to see Cyndi Lauper and Cher for my birthday!  I haven't been to a concert in YEARS and WHAT A COOL CONCERT THAT WILL BE.  
  • Taking a PTO day with one of my BFF.  I love hanging out with her.
  • Father's Day.  I'm delighted that it's coming up, that Raj will get to spend it with his friends that are here.  He's an amazing Dad.  Dev and I are lucky to have him.
  • Relay for Life
Meh:
  • Actually turning 40
  • Doing 40 push ups on my 40th. 
I'm really feeling like I'm in a great place right now.  I hope you are as well.