I am so not updaty McGee.

This post will be a random collection of thoughts. Semi-coherent at best, I'm sure.

I'm sitting here on the couch with my snoozing 11 week old son beside me. He isn't sleeping particularly well because he brought home a nasty cold from daycare, one we are both fighting.

I am seriously considering buying and trying a netti pot. I must have lost my fucking mind, because never before in my life have I considered not only pouring warm water up my nose to wash the snot out, but also PAYING FOR AN APPARATUS to do the same. This cold is just that bad.

We are currently living in a one bedroom apartment. Raj and I are on the lookout for a larger place. Yesterday we toured 2 places, a duplex and a townhouse. Both are available for roughly the same rent we are paying now, each with it's own charm.

We have decided we like the duplex. A lot. It has just about everything. It's 3 bedrooms, with one full bath and two 3/4 baths. The family room is roomy, the laundry is in a convenient place, there is more than enough storage for 2 families like ours, a huge yard, a deck and tons of kitchen cabinet/counter space. The only down sides are some unfortunately colored carpets and the smallness of the living room. I hope nothing happens to prevent the rental. I can really see Deven growing up there.

The townhouse was just ehh, but for the FANTASTIC kitchen and the great views. The tradeoffs there were that it still has an apartment feel and the SHARP drop to the street below from the microscopic backyard.

Deven has recently started squealing. This is even cuter than cooing. He is the most awesome little person. Yesterday, I bounced him on my leg and he was squealing and grinning at me. Made my day!

The phone keeps ringing, bothering the baby. It's starting to piss me off. Particularly because they don't say anything. Once I got a call waiting with them calling me again while I was still trying to get them to at least say who they were calling for. I hate the phone.

I think that is all I know. Sad, that's all I have to say.

Vaccinations

Deven is 2 months old now and that means vaccinations.

Daddy holds down the baby, mama cries when baby starts crying. I'm such a pansy.



New development from the past few days. Deven doesn't want bottles, he wants MAMAs BOOBS.

Dude, I am totally important.

2 months old in just a few days

Dear Deven,
This has been such a cool month. You have started smiling, cooing, reaching for objects in front of you.

It's also been a tough month. You had whole nights that you didn't think sleeping was necessary for either of us. You don't just get a little upset anymore. You get pissed. I am talking wailing, red faced, fists balled up pissed. You go straight from smiling to this point.

It is also been a tough month because I went back to work this week, and you went to daycare.
I cried so hard leaving you. It's really a miracle that I didn't get in an accident driving to work. I was very proud when the daycare lady told me that you are 'the most wonderful baby' and 'a delight'. I was happy to learn that you were eating and sleeping well at daycare, but at the same time, it made me a little sad. My baby doesn't need me quite as much anymore.

Yesterday, when I picked you up from daycare, you made my day. You smiled at me, cooed and made my heart melt all over again.

I love you little man. More than I can ever express.

Just don't grow up too soon, k? I really cherish this time with you.

Love,
Mama

So THIS is what they mean by overstimulated

For most of the first 6 weeks of his life, Deven has slept like an angel. Snuggled into your arm, sprawled out in his Pack n' Play, tucked into his crib, or curled up beside Mama and Papa in their bed, he slept for huge chucks of time-3-4 hours at a stretch, would eat and then right back to sleep with him.

He is still napping like that throughout the day and for most of the night. He's a joy to have and we count our blessings that we have such a calm, relaxed, adorable child. Then evening rolls around. For the majority of the evening, he is PISSED. He wails, he refuses all comforts. He is completely inconsolable. It breaks my heart to see him cry at this stage of his life.

What worked last night was to turn on the fan, rock him slowly, rub his back, and sing softly to him.

Because we are problem solvers by nature, we have decided to institute a 8 PM quiet time. No electronics after 8 PM. Only soft voices and baby snuggling. We have got to solve this problem, because it is really upsetting to see your very young child so upset.

Don't get me wrong, though. I'll not be one of those parents that gives in and lets their kid have whatever they want because it is easier than dealing with a tantrum. No way. This is different. This kid is crying because he is overwhelmed. I just need to figure out how to help him feel less so.

Later on when he throws a fit because he MUST have that Elmo doll. Yeah, that's when we apologize to the nearest store employee, explaining that we can't buy any items today because baby boy cannot behave himself and then we leave the store. I'll.Not. Have. It. End of discussion.

I start back to work slowly next week. Shit. That went by too fast. I wanna stay home with him forever.

Deven Thomas is 1 month old

I cannot believe that a month has gone by already. He is already such a little sweetheart. Growing so big already!

Things that are notable about this month:

Sleep grins. Mama's heart melts
BABY FARTS STINK! Lots and lots of baby farts!
Breast feeding is harder than I thought.
He's started sleeping 3 hours at a time. I am starting to feel somewhat well rested. This is a recent (last few days) development.

Here is my letter to Deven- I will try to write this letter to him every month so that he can look back on them when he is older.

Dear Deven,
You came into the world right before a storm and very cold weather. You showed your stubborn side by refusing to be turned when they tried to do the version. You came into the world via C-section on 1/18/2008 at 7:54 PM. Your daddy brought you to me and I said "Hi, Deven"

You turned your head towards me and it was love right then.

I would do anything in this world for you.

I'm looking forward to seeing your first smile, hearing you laugh, watching you roll over and sit up.

I always knew I would love you, but I never imagined that I would love you this much. You are the best thing I have ever done in my life.

Today, you were sleeping on my lap and you were grinning in your sleep. Then you giggled. It was the cutest sound I have ever heard.

I hope I am as good a mama as you deserve. I will try my hardest.

Love,
Mama

Goals for 2011

my top priority is the 35 lbs i have pledged for pound for pound challenge.

i will also be donating 1 lb of food for every lb i lose for the entire  year.  if i lose 50 lbs or more, i will donate 2 lbs of food for every  lb i lose.

*this will be from my most recently documented weight at sparkpeople.com, as i am on a  scale abstinence thing until 1 feb 2011.   (the abstinence thing might  change if i don't lose my food apathy soon)
here are the goals that i have for this year and the timeline for them.


i want to be under 200 lbs by the end of the quarter.

9 months pregnant

On Wednesday, I will be 37 weeks pregnant. This marks the time when the baby is considered 'full term'. I could have this child any day. I bet money that he decides to be late, though.

I can tell you that this journey, while cool, is very tiring indeed. Now, I have lots of back pain, gigantic swelling feet, near constant menstrual like cramps, and a belly that moves kind of wildly at times.

I have our apartment set up for baby, our hospital bags packed and if I have my way, my husband will get his ass in gear and get the carseat installed VERY SOON. It drives me nuts that this isn't already done.

Oh, but if I could get the world to work within my timeframe. There would be few instances of procrastination.

I feel somewhat guilty that I haven't done a better job of updating here. It would be nice to have this documented for when our little boy gets here.

Deven Thomas, I can hardly wait to see your face. You can be born whenever you feel ready.
Love,
Mama.