Awakening

I love Spring.  I love those first crisp days when you aren't sure if you should wear a jacket or a coat.  My desire for outdoor fitness is high, so I put the Gentle Leader on crazy Conner and put on my running shoes and head out the door. 

The world is still mostly painted in graytone.  Grass is gray, dirty snow melting into rotten puddles on lawns.  Many sidewalks are damaged from winter's aggression.  There is a crunch underfoot from sand, no longer needed, but yet to wash away. 

My app tells me it's time to start running.  I quicken my pace slightly and urge the dog to a jog.  We run along, turning up a steep hill in a neighborhood street.  I notice the trees are starting to bud.  I smile, remembering how gorgeous this stretch of land is in the summer.  My app tells me it is time to walk.  I slow my pace and look at the ground below.  Little patches of grass are starting to turn green.  I smile again, I love watching the world wake up.  My app tells me to run again.  This run is longer.  As I go, I focus on my breathing. One, two, three, four in and one, two, three, four out.  I'm getting more tired.  This is the part where I start to think about giving up.  I remind myself that I am no quitter.  I pick up my knees a little higher, push a little harder.  The run gets less tiresome.  I have renewed energy.  The app tells me it is time to walk.  I slow my pace and praise the dog.  We decide where we want to go next.  The app tells me it is time to run again.  It's going well.  I am lost in noticing the earth's awakening. It occurs to me that I am having my own awakening. 

This past few months, I've realized that I am strong, way tougher than I give myself credit for.  I can keep up in a very challenging workout.  I'm not elite, but I am trying.  I don't quit.  I keep running at a challenge until I finish it.  The app tells me it is time to walk again.  We slow our pace and notice the world.  I'm grateful for these minutes, where it is just me and my dog vs. my desire to succeed and my obesity.  I'm getting stronger every run, every workout.

It's time to run again.  I am tired when this run starts.  Normally, I'd want to quit.  I won't be quitting.  The dog starts to pull in pursuit of another dog.  I tell him to stop.  We watch where that dog goes and turn the opposite way.  I don't want to spend the last few minutes of this workout being pulled.  I am in charge of me, of this time.  I push myself.  Very tired.  Pick up feet a little higher, count my breaths again, one, two, three, four in and one, two, three, four out.  Focus on one thing so you can't focus on the smaller things.  I'm not really that tired.  One, two, three, four in and one, two, three, four out.  And it's time to walk and cool down.

The athlete in me is awakening with spring.  I am inspired.  I can't wait to see how far I can go.

Be well, everyone.