for my entire life, it feels like i have been trying to lose weight. i was a chunky kid. i was a fat high schooler up until i did slimfast over a summer and ended up being just a chunky junior in high school- same for senior year.
then in 2003, i found weight watchers. i totally found my thing, weight peeled off. i went from 218 to 160 in like 6 months. i was a weightloss superstar. i was around 172 lbs the day i got married and although still chunky (about size 12) i felt super cute.
then i quit smoking and bounced up to around 210. i dieted off and on for a few years, not caring too much and for some reason, decided to do a master cleanse. i lost like 35 lbs doing a few of them but completely murdered my metabolism. too bad. especially since i got pregnant RIGHT after. disaster struck. i loaded on weight. fast. i went from about 189 lbs to about 279 the day i went to the hospital for a c-section (my son was breech)
i was miserable. after all the bloating from surgery and being pregnant wore off, i was left about 259 lbs. i bounced around at around that weight until about may of 2010. i tried weight watchers, but just couldn't get it going. i did the biggest loser club and lost some weight there, but then my elliptical broke for a second time (it was a piece of junk) and i lost my motivation. then i started doing sparkpeople.com's fit firm and fired up and watching what i ate. then i did the 30 day shred. then i joined some bootcamps. a good amount of weight was coming off, i was looking a little better. i went from about a size 20 to a size 16.
that's where i am today. i am in a funk. a few weeks after thanksgiving, i was down to my lowest pre-baby weight.. this morning, in my full jammies (the lowest weight was a naked weight) the bathroom scale showed 12 pounds more. ugh. christmas was horrible for my weight loss efforts.
so i need to do something. here is my plan. i am going to log the food that i eat. for right now, if i am over calories, that's ok. but i am going to make myself be accountable for my food. actually, the next post on this blog will be my food (edited through the day to include everything i am eating).
i am going to have a daily fitness post. i must post even if i am not doing anything. but i need to be doing things. most monday, wednesday and saturday, i will be doing couch to 5k and a strength training video from sparkpeople.com. tuesday and sunday is yoga. if my husband doesn't bowl, then thursday is also yoga. if he does, thursday is zumba on the wii. sunday is also zumba, but at the gym. that should keep me busy for 6 days a week. on friday, i will try to do a little zumba for the wii. i have a goal set at sparkpeople.com to log 24000 fitness minutes this year. that's roughly double what i did last year. i can do it.
on monday, my bodybugg should be delivered. that's the point at which things will really get going. because i am going to aim for a 1000 calorie deficit per day minimum. i'm hoping that the deficit can come from exercise. because i like to eat. clearly. a girl doesn't get to 220 lbs because she hates it.
today's workout is an open house at another gym. my friend karen goes there. we are going to do a couple mini classes. it should amount to about 90 minutes workout.
i have a scale abstinence thing going on until 1 february 2011. i can look at the bathroom scale, but i can't take an official weight on the wiifit until then.
08 January 2011
26 November 2010
I haven't posted here in forever. Deven is 34 months old
Dear Deven,
What a journey we have been on with you. You are talking up a storm, you are pretty much potty trained, you can identify ALL of your letters, write some of them. You know what sounds letters make and can count to at least 20.
You are a whiz at puzzles, you love to color.
You are the sweetest, most genuinely fun person I know. You just moved up to the 3 year old classroom at your school. This must have been a good move, because most days when I get there to pick you up, you say "noooo, go back to work, i stay here and play"
You are the best of your dad and me. We are so grateful to have you, every single day.
Love,
Mommy (he doesn't call me mommy anymore)
What a journey we have been on with you. You are talking up a storm, you are pretty much potty trained, you can identify ALL of your letters, write some of them. You know what sounds letters make and can count to at least 20.
You are a whiz at puzzles, you love to color.
You are the sweetest, most genuinely fun person I know. You just moved up to the 3 year old classroom at your school. This must have been a good move, because most days when I get there to pick you up, you say "noooo, go back to work, i stay here and play"
You are the best of your dad and me. We are so grateful to have you, every single day.
Love,
Mommy (he doesn't call me mommy anymore)
02 December 2009
22 months
Dear Deven,
You continue to be the such a highlight in our lives. We are very blessed to have you with us.
A few weeks ago, you suddenly became terrified of the bathtub. We were very concerned about this and tried lots of things to try to help you overcome your fears. We bought you new bath toys, new bubble bath. We had an upcoming trip to stay in a hotel with your cousins, and we were afraid you wouldn't want to swim.
Fortunately, with gentle exposure to the bath, you became slightly less afraid. Once we got to the hotel and got you in the water, you lost all of your fear. Just a few minutes ago, we gave you another bath and you smiled, laughed and played and really enjoyed your bath.
There hasn't been a huge number of changes over last month, but you are always adding on to your skill set and your vocabulary.
Your personality is so great and fun. I love you so much.
Thanks for being such a wonderful little man. My life is so rich because of you.
Love,
Mama
You continue to be the such a highlight in our lives. We are very blessed to have you with us.
A few weeks ago, you suddenly became terrified of the bathtub. We were very concerned about this and tried lots of things to try to help you overcome your fears. We bought you new bath toys, new bubble bath. We had an upcoming trip to stay in a hotel with your cousins, and we were afraid you wouldn't want to swim.
Fortunately, with gentle exposure to the bath, you became slightly less afraid. Once we got to the hotel and got you in the water, you lost all of your fear. Just a few minutes ago, we gave you another bath and you smiled, laughed and played and really enjoyed your bath.
There hasn't been a huge number of changes over last month, but you are always adding on to your skill set and your vocabulary.
Your personality is so great and fun. I love you so much.
Thanks for being such a wonderful little man. My life is so rich because of you.
Love,
Mama
28 October 2009
20 and 21 months
Dear Deven,
This past two months have been crazy around here. You are changing all of the time. The 'terrible twos" are here with a vengeance. You are still the same sweet boy most of the time, but tell you no, OH MY GOD, HOLD ON TO YOUR HAT. A FIT WILL BE THROWN. This doesn't really help you , but there you go.
You can now say the alphabet up to f- pure memorization, of course. You count in your own unique way. "One, Two, Eight, Eight, Eight"
When you want us to sing the alphabet song again, you say "Ahhhhp Beeeeeeeeee" and then point to us as if to say "Now you guys do the rest" You LOVE to do this.
You are still a great kid. You are learning a lot every day. You have started to really love to color, most of the time you can correctly identify your colors. If we are ever at a loss for an activity for you, coloring almost always works out.
You love the book "Guess How Much I Love You" and have started throwing your arms apart to indicate that you love us. "MUCH"
You are getting very devious. At bed time, you will stop me at the door "Mama?" 'yes, Peanut' (pointing at wall) "BUN" 'that's a bunny, very good.' "Mama?" (looking around trying to find another reason for me to stay in the room) "MUCH" 'I love you, too. Good night, Peanut"
You've brought back separation anxiety in a big way. Especially when I drop you off at Daycare. I'm glad that I am still so important to you, but it really breaks my heart to leave you, especially when you are crying for me.
You are such a warm, loving child. Every day that I spend with you, even when you are being a stinker, is a treat and a gift. I'm the luckiest mama ever.
I love you thiiiiiiiis MUCH.
Love,
Mama
This past two months have been crazy around here. You are changing all of the time. The 'terrible twos" are here with a vengeance. You are still the same sweet boy most of the time, but tell you no, OH MY GOD, HOLD ON TO YOUR HAT. A FIT WILL BE THROWN. This doesn't really help you , but there you go.
You can now say the alphabet up to f- pure memorization, of course. You count in your own unique way. "One, Two, Eight, Eight, Eight"
When you want us to sing the alphabet song again, you say "Ahhhhp Beeeeeeeeee" and then point to us as if to say "Now you guys do the rest" You LOVE to do this.
You are still a great kid. You are learning a lot every day. You have started to really love to color, most of the time you can correctly identify your colors. If we are ever at a loss for an activity for you, coloring almost always works out.
You love the book "Guess How Much I Love You" and have started throwing your arms apart to indicate that you love us. "MUCH"
You are getting very devious. At bed time, you will stop me at the door "Mama?" 'yes, Peanut' (pointing at wall) "BUN" 'that's a bunny, very good.' "Mama?" (looking around trying to find another reason for me to stay in the room) "MUCH" 'I love you, too. Good night, Peanut"
You've brought back separation anxiety in a big way. Especially when I drop you off at Daycare. I'm glad that I am still so important to you, but it really breaks my heart to leave you, especially when you are crying for me.
You are such a warm, loving child. Every day that I spend with you, even when you are being a stinker, is a treat and a gift. I'm the luckiest mama ever.
I love you thiiiiiiiis MUCH.
Love,
Mama
27 August 2009
19 Months
Dear Deven,
This month has been a wonderful month. You are so full of life and love. You are really expanding your vocabulary by leaps and bounds. We are now at the place that, if we work with you, you can learn 2-3 words in a day. You recently started saying "uncle" and "baba" (baba is Hindi for Grandpa)
If prompted, you will say thank you and you routinely say please when you want something.
You have also gotten a lot better at coloring. You scribble instead of just pounding them on the paper.
The hitting, hair pulling and biting is a lot better this month. Thankfully. So is the face scratching.
Unfortunately, you are still throwing your toys a lot.
You are a lot better at knowing what you want, and you do a great job of saying please when you want something. Unfortunately you routinely say NO when you mean YES. You say NO a lot in general.
You are still my sweet, cuddly, loving, gorgeous boy and I am still the luckiest mama in the world.
I love you, little man.
Love,
Mama
This month has been a wonderful month. You are so full of life and love. You are really expanding your vocabulary by leaps and bounds. We are now at the place that, if we work with you, you can learn 2-3 words in a day. You recently started saying "uncle" and "baba" (baba is Hindi for Grandpa)
If prompted, you will say thank you and you routinely say please when you want something.
You have also gotten a lot better at coloring. You scribble instead of just pounding them on the paper.
The hitting, hair pulling and biting is a lot better this month. Thankfully. So is the face scratching.
Unfortunately, you are still throwing your toys a lot.
You are a lot better at knowing what you want, and you do a great job of saying please when you want something. Unfortunately you routinely say NO when you mean YES. You say NO a lot in general.
You are still my sweet, cuddly, loving, gorgeous boy and I am still the luckiest mama in the world.
I love you, little man.
Love,
Mama
23 July 2009
18 Months
Dear Deven,
This month has been wonderful but challenging. At first, you had a hard time getting used to the new house. You have adjusted nicely and are really enjoying your new space. It's a lot more baby friendly around here and you have a lot of fun in your room and play room.
You started with a lot of biting and hitting, mostly mama and daddy- thankfully, you seem to be settling down with this recently.
Your verbal skills are really picking up. You seem to pick up a new word or two every day.
You absolutely love to swing in your swingset in the back yard. You also love to blow bubbles but you aren't too good at that yet.
You love to run around behind your bubble mower. You use this in the house and we think you might be pretending to vacuum.
Just recently, you seem to have stuck up friendship with Sam the cat, you do a really good job petting him nicely and he is finally tolerating this really well.
As always, you are a sweet, loving little man. If I say "Deven, give me a squeeze" you run over and give the best hug.
You really are the best kid most of the time and we are lucky to have you.
This month has been wonderful but challenging. At first, you had a hard time getting used to the new house. You have adjusted nicely and are really enjoying your new space. It's a lot more baby friendly around here and you have a lot of fun in your room and play room.
You started with a lot of biting and hitting, mostly mama and daddy- thankfully, you seem to be settling down with this recently.
Your verbal skills are really picking up. You seem to pick up a new word or two every day.
You absolutely love to swing in your swingset in the back yard. You also love to blow bubbles but you aren't too good at that yet.
You love to run around behind your bubble mower. You use this in the house and we think you might be pretending to vacuum.
Just recently, you seem to have stuck up friendship with Sam the cat, you do a really good job petting him nicely and he is finally tolerating this really well.
As always, you are a sweet, loving little man. If I say "Deven, give me a squeeze" you run over and give the best hug.
You really are the best kid most of the time and we are lucky to have you.
23 June 2009
17 months
Dear Deven,
You turned 17 months on Thursday. This has been a challenging month for you because for the first part of the month, your life was being interrupted. We bought a house and were packing up the duplex that has been home for the past year.
During this time, we transitioned you to a new daycare. You handled this like a champion. You didn't fuss or complain.
Now that we are moved into the house, we have some concerns about how you are adjusting. During the waking hours, you seem happy, running back and forth between the living room, the play room and your bedroom, but at night, you are showing some discomfort. I know in the end, you are going to be very happy here and we will keep doing everything we can to help you get acclimated.
You started doing some really cool things. First, you started really trying to learn to jump. You added several words to your vocabulary. You have started really babbling much more than ever and what you say is starting to sound like real words.
You have also started to really understand *and say* no. If we tell you no, sometimes you get really sad, but your personality is so awesome that you never stay sad for very long. You have also gotten more trustworthy. We can let you play in another room for good stretches of time because you seem to really want to be a good boy, and have stopped putting everything in your mouth.
You have also started to show your affection more. You kiss your sheep, you kiss my shoulder, you kiss daddy's shoulder, you put your hands on my cheek and give me a kiss on the mouth.
We are so proud of you, little man. You are the best.
Love,
Mama
You turned 17 months on Thursday. This has been a challenging month for you because for the first part of the month, your life was being interrupted. We bought a house and were packing up the duplex that has been home for the past year.
During this time, we transitioned you to a new daycare. You handled this like a champion. You didn't fuss or complain.
Now that we are moved into the house, we have some concerns about how you are adjusting. During the waking hours, you seem happy, running back and forth between the living room, the play room and your bedroom, but at night, you are showing some discomfort. I know in the end, you are going to be very happy here and we will keep doing everything we can to help you get acclimated.
You started doing some really cool things. First, you started really trying to learn to jump. You added several words to your vocabulary. You have started really babbling much more than ever and what you say is starting to sound like real words.
You have also started to really understand *and say* no. If we tell you no, sometimes you get really sad, but your personality is so awesome that you never stay sad for very long. You have also gotten more trustworthy. We can let you play in another room for good stretches of time because you seem to really want to be a good boy, and have stopped putting everything in your mouth.
You have also started to show your affection more. You kiss your sheep, you kiss my shoulder, you kiss daddy's shoulder, you put your hands on my cheek and give me a kiss on the mouth.
We are so proud of you, little man. You are the best.
Love,
Mama
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